So much has happened and un-happened since my last post, namely:
Happened: Job offer.
Confused? I was too.
On Wednesday, I was resigned to become a nanny. I wrote about it, I made peace with it, and on Thursday I took a CPR class so that on Friday, when I interviewed with the family, I would be the best candidate I could be. And then on Monday, if they wanted me, I would start. Things were falling into place, and fast.
During my CPR class, I recieved a voicemail from a friend about another job possiblity. I stood in the hallway of the hospital getting excited. This is it! I thought. God didn't want me to do the nannying thing and so, at the last second, he's giving me something else. I called my friend back, got some details and finished my CPR class. (FYI, I rocked it. I could save your life.)
Then I walked out to my car, called the potential employer, and sat in the parking lot of the hospital for AN HOUR chatting, hearing a little about the company, and getting an offer for the job! No interview, no meeting, no resume, no waiting, more money than nannying, a REAL job.
I was sure God was getting all up in my business and making things right.
And now, a week later and still jobless(x2), I know that to be true.
I canceled the nanny interview. I felt bad about that. Then, I went and met with HR and would-be boss, and the whole time all I could think was: this is not for me. Can you imagine how crazy that made me feel? I wanted a job, I needed a job, and there it was, a job... What was my problem?!? Without going into detail, there were several factors that made me stop short of accepting the position. I spent several hours thinking it through and talking with Steven before I declined the job offer.
I was pleaded with and enticed, to reconsider... So, I did. And spent the whole of last week working out the details of my employment, scheduled to start Monday, the 22nd.
Last Friday, I declined a second time on the advice of my family. I walked away from the only job offer I had and, right after I felt really crappy about it, I felt relief.
Now, some twenty-valuable-lessons-about-business-conduct later, I'm back to the beginning of the job search.
*palm to face*
Being an adult just really takes the cake sometimes.
I wish I could go back to being a child grocer in my parent's basement, with the mini plastic groceries and wind-along conveyer belt. That job had the best benefits.
*Psssst, Don't know what Morton's Fork is? Here you go: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morton's_fork